I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Randomize
