Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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