these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
