carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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