from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize