guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
