Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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