i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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