Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
