Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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