you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
