No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
