we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
