I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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