Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
don't judge my taste in strippers
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Randomize
