if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
