I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I think I sprained my soul last night
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
But break dance skills will only take you so far
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
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