In the future we'll all be gay
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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