I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I think your dad took our porno
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
