Swine flu is the new snow day.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
