would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
