my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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