Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
