Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
babies were throwing up all over the place
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
