I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
