You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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