I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
