shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
