Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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