It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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