It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
