you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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