This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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