To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
