whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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