Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
