I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize