Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
