in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
