In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
