Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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