Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
