she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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