Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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