How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
well, you know. whores of a feather.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
