i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Boobs speak an international language.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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