I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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