Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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