whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
