First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
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