he was CRYING into my vagina
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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